haha today mr chan gave back our report cards.. haha
he said that he can be certain that i'll be a good netballer
next time.. haha so i guess he took the message i wrote
for him seriously? haha happy though. encouraged for the first time...

anyways.. did nothing today. so freaking lor...
haiz.. i said he was biased and stuff.. but i forgive him. haha
kinda felt bad lah.. he said i can't play netball as a full time job though
haha but at least i can earn someting! if they bench me,
i won't even get any money!

ok being paranoid. haha i finally have enough money to buy shoes!
so freaking happy...

teo peng suan saw my cuts... haha she was really nice.
but teo jin ling's scolding was more exciting. haha
haiz.. went toilet, came back, both my penknives missing k!!
wah lao... i can buy new ones in case u didn't know..

wah lao i really miss them lah! they had sentimental value!
the green one, and the red and white one!
i miss u guys!

no there's no other way to relieve stress but to go out..
gonna get new ones soon... a few really sharp ones..

hah sara cut me! haha i asked her too.. haha damn scary.
she didn't really used strength but it hurt like hell!

haha haiz... i wanna bang my head against the wall
or something... but cannot. too little brain cells for that..
haiz... seriously... i dunno wad's with me...

i think i'm going crazy literally. if i hear something bad
or when i get angry, i'll just stone there for a minute
and the next thing on my mind is penknife... haiz....
DUNNO LAH!

fucked up way of living...
k here are the few main causes..
1. benched from netball
2.some bitch
3.secret
4.getting caught for cheating in chinese spelling
-kinda dumb but it was the second thing that
triggered off my habit again..
5.money
6.family
7.self-consciousness
8.forgot...

haiz.. well.. i dunno wad to do with my life now.

wanna play bball or go out now..
i really need to go out.
i'll be staying at home in my room.
or going out. not facing anyone that has to do with skl,,

haiz.. ok gtg now.

Friday, September 03, 2004